Is hell other people? By Ines LE GOURRIEREC

Keep smiling!

Social networks are the high-tech means for others to make our lives hell: anonymous trolls cowardly targeting their victims, Twitter feed alienating parts of the population, you know what I’m talking about... It’s like Big Brother is for real, but we have ourselves created him to terrorize the individual…

Can the individual ever escape from other people’s damning judgement? Some people do manage to “withdraw” mentally. They deem other people’s opinion basically worthless; they just care about themselves and nothing else interests them much. By choosing to block out other people’s views and opinions, they manage to live as if on a desert island. They’re probably content enough… But there are very few people like that; most of us are quite sensitive to what other people say about us.

Have you heard of the “Hikikimori”? It is a Japanese word. It describes those young people who physically cut themselves off from the rest of the world because, for them, others are “hell” indeed. These teenagers stay cooped up in their bedroom most of the year and refuse any direct human contact. 0.2% of the Japanese population are Hikikimori and it is sadly our modern way of life which is to blame for the strange phenomenon. These teens say they feel overwhelmed by society and the strong social pressure they are under. The irony is that by choosing to escape what they perceive as “hell”, they lock themselves in a home-made hell! Even if they do so by choice, Hikikomori are sad: not only do they not have any friends; they have lost their capacity to live in society. Furthermore, they become unable to dissociate right from wrong, making their eventual return to society extremely difficult to say the least.

What about religious hermits, physically and mentally isolated from the world? Surprisingly, these people do not feel isolated. Michael Gendronneau, a retired worker-priest who became a hermit in the Ardeche, says he never feels lonely in his hermitage. He considers that “prayer is a collective activity.” His prayers are part of a collective effort, and that he, in a sense, “lives in a crowd.” His is a fine example of a person who has dedicated their life to religion; he can cope with the absence of people and confinement because he has God for company. Interestingly enough, Gendronneau also says (I quote): “first and foremost, I’m here to pray, otherwise my hermitage would quickly become hell…” He has a job to do, and he can best do it without others crowding him!

Well, what about you, or you? Are you like the Hikikomori, terrified by others and rather narcissistic, fleeing the company of people? Or are you thinking of becoming a hermit, at peace with yourself and the world, not dependent on the company or judgement of mere people?

No, you are probably like most people, with a fun family and a few friends, and you get on okay with most people. You are more or less at ease with yourself, trying not to let gossip get to you, right?

I just hope (for your sake) that you are not a bully or someone who spreads rumours or ignores others… If you are, you are making other people’s lives hell, and, in the end, your own life will be hell too. To be happy, we need each other, don’t we?

Is your life sad, and are you making others pay the price? In that case, don’t say “oh, hell!” when you look in the mirror, say: “hello!” Then smile, because, as Louis Armstrong sang: “When you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you!”