Tuesday, 25 April 2017

Is hell other people? By Lyvan POTELLERET


The notion that “hell is other people” raises the question of my relationship to the “other,” a person similar to myself; another "me" but who is not me. By asserting that hell is the other, hell enters our world, the world of the living. The abyss comes up to the earth's surface and hell is lived here and now; it is no longer what might await us after death…

The other’s presence in Sartre’s world is a forced, almost inevitable, cohabitation with him, a horrid promiscuity, but are human relations inevitably suffocating?

We all judge each other most of the time, mostly negatively. Even friends judge each other and it is difficult to accept criticism. In Huis Clos, the characters find it difficult to admit that the others are right in their judgments; we hide our failings, like being a coward, to ourselves.

Children are cruel judges of each other, especially to those who are different. What they say to each other can sometimes be traumatizing and some children develop inferiority complexes or psychoses during adolescence.

The need to judge others comes essentially from our aggressive nature. Whether it is consciously or unconsciously we seem to need to make others suffer, to make their lives a living hell.

The presence of others and being permanently subject to their judgments is hell because we find it difficult to accept criticism. If we do accept it, we think we are the way others see us and we in a sense lose our real identity. It is necessary to free oneself from the objectifying gaze of others, to escape from them.

But the gaze of others is indispensable to build oneself. We see it in the distress of the marginalized, rejected by society and ignored; they would prefer to be hated rather than just ignored. The gaze of others is indeed indispensable, both for self-consciousness and self-knowledge. As Sartre wrote in Existentialism is a humanism (1945): "To get closer to the truth about myself, I have to go through the other" (« Pour obtenir une vérité quelconque sur moi, il faut que je passe par l'autre »).

Nota bene: this is an edited and abridged version of Lyvan's speech for the "JBM" public speaking competition.

Sunday, 23 April 2017

Is hell other people? By Emeline D'ESCRIVAN

Be yourself!

What is hell? It is not a world you go to after you die; that is a simplistic religious idea. No… Imagine the worst, and that is hell. Does it include other people? Is it created by people other than me? Do I contribute to this horror that is hell? Hell is definitely man-made. People can, I believe, make your life hell (like they can also make it into something worthwhile). It all depends on how you get on with others, don’t you think?

Hell is others? But who are the “others” exactly? It sounds like “others” could be anyone of you in this room! And, if someone else can be hell for me, I can be hell for him or her, since I am, for him or her “someone else”. In other words, we can make each other’s lives hell… I am not just a victim; I can be a torturer too.

I believe in the Nietzschean notion that “what doesn't kill you makes you stronger”. If people are bad towards you, it can make you into a tougher person. And, if people are trying to mess with you: react! Do you have a victim mentality? I mean, have you become used to considering others as being the cause of your unhappiness? In a sense, you have chosen to let other people mess you up. In that case, you can either keep moaning that life isn’t fair or you can live up to the challenge of dealing with the hell others are trying to inflict on you; only you, in the end, can deal with the negative aspects of your life. It’s up to you to tell people to leave you alone! For example, at school, you can let bullies insult you, humiliate and exclude you, or you can see your bullies as sad cowardly insecure sheep and hit back. I don’t mean be like them, but be better than them. If you laugh when they want to make you cry, you have won. Sartre said: “If you are lonely when you’re alone, you are in bad company.” What that means is that you should learn to like yourself so that you will be strong enough not to need others, at least when those others are not worth knowing. That way, bullies will just seem pathetic to you; their “slings and arrows” will be like water off a duck’s back! To exist or not, that’s the problem only you can solve…

Anyway, you need to accept that “it is the nature of men to be base, unjust and selfish” (Sartre said that too). The state of the world proves my point. Just look at some of the leaders: a fascist mass-murderer in the Philippines, a Stalinist ego-maniac in North-Korea, a psychotic billionaire bully in the USA, Flamby in France (and, soon, a neo-Nazi female)… They are dangerous, corrupt, and/or incompetent leaders and we elected them or are too scared to get rid of them. That means the majority of people are weak, frustrated cowards with limited intelligence who hope their existential problems, their poverty, self-inflicted illnesses or boredom, will be miraculously solved by electing a megalomaniac!

But, you are better than most people, right? You are strong enough to make the world better for yourself and for others, aren’t you? It rather depends on you accepting the fact that you can be strong if you want to be, that you can always do something with what others try to make you into (“On peut toujours faire quelque chose de ce qu’on a fait de nous.”) That’s Sartre, again.

Is hell other people? By Charlotte GENEIX

 
Get a life!

First, let’s define “hell”. It is the place you go to after you die (if you have not been accepted into heaven that is!), right? But, hell is also something you can live in or live through, here and now. It is when you think life isn’t worth it anymore because your relationship to others has become so awful.

Now, let’s define “other people.” It means people that are different or distinct from myself, and often people that I don’t know, i.e. the potentially dangerous ones… For me, that’s you, staring at me. And I am the “other” for you. So, following the Sartrian aphorism, you are my hell, and I am yours…

You probably know a guy who, when he was a kid, was a little plump and way too spoilt by his parents. He was bullied by the other kids, who didn’t really realize how much they were hurting him. He grew up totally lacking self-confidence. Today, he has suicidal tendencies…

Less dramatic: what about people who are just shy? Their shyness is part of their personality; they can’t really do anything about it. Some people do manage to control it; think of Beyoncé or Obama. Most of us are at least a little apprehensive when meeting new people. Maybe you don’t talk at all and just stare at them, waiting for them to make the opening gambit, or maybe you talk too much? However you behave, it shows that we usually care a lot about the way other people consider us. Maybe we worry too much about it? We tend to try to live up to what we think other people’s expectations of us are and not, in the end, live for ourselves.

Sometimes, “other people” are people we have never met, or are unlikely to meet, and who make our lives hell. People like Hitler who made so many people’s lives hell. Or your boss who decides to fire you for a reason you do not comprehend.

Sometimes, the people who hurt us the most are the ones we love the most. Like Alexandra Lange, who was beaten by her husband and who killed him because, she said: “It was him or me.” It was, she thought, the only way to get out of the hell he had made of her life. But, murdering her violent husband did not make her less unhappy, it just threw her into another nightmare. According to Sartre, “we do not judge the people we love.” We trust them, we open our hearts to them, but, in doing so, we become vulnerable; it becomes easy for them to destroy us if they want to…

Is there anybody in this room who has never been hurt in some way by someone else? It may have been by your best friend, or your boyfriend or girlfriend, or even your parents. Because you value them more than anyone else, when the people you love hurt you, it really hurts. But, are you not guilty too of having done harm to someone you cherish?

Sartre wrote: “Everything comes to us from others. To be is to belong to someone.” We are stuck with each other because, alone, our life loses its meaning. But, shared with someone else, it often becomes a living hell. The divorce rates tend to prove this; did you know that in France, the majority of married couples now separate (click here!)?

So, I think we can say that, yes, hell can indeed be caused by other people. However, I think we ourselves as individuals are the main cause of our lack of personal well-being. We create our own hell because we always want to be “better” than others: we are vain, wanting to leave our mark on this world, or power-hungry, wanting to control those around us.

Anyway, before blaming other people for your rotten existence, remember that, as Sartre once said: “We do not know what we want and yet we are responsible for what we are.” So, if your friends are fiendish, it’s your fault for not making up your mind and letting them choose you as their friend…

Listen to Charlotte on YouTube: click HERE!

Is hell other people? By Ines LE GOURRIEREC

Keep smiling!

Social networks are the high-tech means for others to make our lives hell: anonymous trolls cowardly targeting their victims, Twitter feed alienating parts of the population, you know what I’m talking about... It’s like Big Brother is for real, but we have ourselves created him to terrorize the individual…

Can the individual ever escape from other people’s damning judgement? Some people do manage to “withdraw” mentally. They deem other people’s opinion basically worthless; they just care about themselves and nothing else interests them much. By choosing to block out other people’s views and opinions, they manage to live as if on a desert island. They’re probably content enough… But there are very few people like that; most of us are quite sensitive to what other people say about us.

Have you heard of the “Hikikimori”? It is a Japanese word. It describes those young people who physically cut themselves off from the rest of the world because, for them, others are “hell” indeed. These teenagers stay cooped up in their bedroom most of the year and refuse any direct human contact. 0.2% of the Japanese population are Hikikimori and it is sadly our modern way of life which is to blame for the strange phenomenon. These teens say they feel overwhelmed by society and the strong social pressure they are under. The irony is that by choosing to escape what they perceive as “hell”, they lock themselves in a home-made hell! Even if they do so by choice, Hikikomori are sad: not only do they not have any friends; they have lost their capacity to live in society. Furthermore, they become unable to dissociate right from wrong, making their eventual return to society extremely difficult to say the least.

What about religious hermits, physically and mentally isolated from the world? Surprisingly, these people do not feel isolated. Michael Gendronneau, a retired worker-priest who became a hermit in the Ardeche, says he never feels lonely in his hermitage. He considers that “prayer is a collective activity.” His prayers are part of a collective effort, and that he, in a sense, “lives in a crowd.” His is a fine example of a person who has dedicated their life to religion; he can cope with the absence of people and confinement because he has God for company. Interestingly enough, Gendronneau also says (I quote): “first and foremost, I’m here to pray, otherwise my hermitage would quickly become hell…” He has a job to do, and he can best do it without others crowding him!

Well, what about you, or you? Are you like the Hikikomori, terrified by others and rather narcissistic, fleeing the company of people? Or are you thinking of becoming a hermit, at peace with yourself and the world, not dependent on the company or judgement of mere people?

No, you are probably like most people, with a fun family and a few friends, and you get on okay with most people. You are more or less at ease with yourself, trying not to let gossip get to you, right?

I just hope (for your sake) that you are not a bully or someone who spreads rumours or ignores others… If you are, you are making other people’s lives hell, and, in the end, your own life will be hell too. To be happy, we need each other, don’t we?

Is your life sad, and are you making others pay the price? In that case, don’t say “oh, hell!” when you look in the mirror, say: “hello!” Then smile, because, as Louis Armstrong sang: “When you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you!”

Is hell other people? By Claire ALEXANDRE


We know others can make your life hell. Think of Cinderella: the eponymous character in the Disney cartoon is treated badly by her own family. Hell is when everyone around you makes you feel less than human and that’s exactly what the cartoon shows us. Cinderella’s demons are the members of her family. She in effect belongs to her stepmother. As a slave, she is not allowed to control her own life. Hell is being trapped. Hell is not being free. There is no exit from Hell…

Just like Garcin in Huis Clos by Jean-Paul Sartre, who is imprisoned by his cowardice (“coward” is the label the other characters in the play use to remind Garcin of his shortcomings), Cinderella is stuck with a label which denies her true self. Her family do not call her by her real name so as to make her understand that she is less important than they are. “Cinderella” feels she can’t escape the hell they’ve made of her life. The only moments she can get away from them is when she’s dreaming or playing with her pets, in other words, when she is not with other people. Only her Fairy Godmother and a Prince Charming will save her (it is a Disney movie after all!).

In the movie WALL.E, the idea that hell is other people is rejected. WALL.E the sentient robot only has one friend: a cockroach. His life is his job: he busily builds absurd skyscrapers from the rubbish the humans who have fled planet earth have left behind. He collects odd objects, classifies them, trying to make sense of the hell-hole created by the profligate humans. His life only takes on meaning when he falls in love with EVE, the feisty female robot sent back to Earth by the space-bound humans to see if life has come back to the planet. Earth is a lonely place and WALL.E, in the end, finds no comfort from his rubbish mission; he has to follow EVE because being with others is what makes sense. Meaning, for the robot lovers and the humans too, comes from cherishing life (planting pizza plants!) in a common effort, in peace and harmony.

It is other people who stopped Cinderella from being able to choose what she could do with her life. In WALL.E, it is the absence of others that makes the robot feel that he is trapped on Earth, just doing what he is programmed to do. The lesson of the film is that we can only feel free to be who we are when we can show who we are to someone, to learn who we are with the help of others, and change for the better because of others. WALL.E realises who he really is when he chooses to help EVE. So, we may say hell is other people but we can also say that heaven is other people too. Happiness is found in a fulfilling relationship; we’re constantly reaching for someone to be with us. If there are no other people we can turn too, life can become a lonely hell…

Let me, to conclude quickly, talk about Beauty and the Beast. The Beast thought his hell was caused by other people: the enchantress cursed him and his castle. He withdrew into himself, refusing to admit his guilt. He became scared of others. From this cartoon, we learn that we are individually responsible, at least in part, for how we relate to others. The Beast becomes a sociopath, choosing to blame others for his ugliness. Hell, in other words, can also be of our own making… It is Beauty who courageously makes the Beast see the errors of his ways. So, the humanist Disney message is still that people can indeed be bad (and bad to each other), but that good people can help you - if you let them - become good again.

L'enfer, c'est les autres ? Sol-Iris FAIDY


“L’enfer c’est les autres”, est une réplique tirée de la pièce “Huis Clos” écrite par Jean-Paul Sartre. Tout d’abord qu’est-ce que l’enfer ? L’enfer est, dans la religion chrétienne, ce lieu dans lequel se trouvent les damnés. En écrivant “l'enfer c'est les autres”, Sartre affirme donc que la vie avec les autres est un véritable supplice.

Mais est-ce vraiment le cas? Pensez-y! La personne à votre droite ou à votre gauche, vous est elle insupportable? Vos amis, vos parents… font partie des “autres” mais pourtant, ils nous donnent le sourire. Alors dans ce cas, pourquoi dire que “l'enfer c'est les autres” ?

Depuis que nous sommes nés, la présence des autres est inévitable. En effet, que ce soit nos parents, nos amis, nos ennemis… Nous sommes entourés de personnes. Nous sommes l’objet de leur regard et inévitablement jugés.

Pendant les 16 ans de ma vie je n’ai pas arrêté de bouger. J’ai eu la possibilité de découvrir non seulement de nouveaux pays, mais aussi la manière dont les gens vous regardent. J’ai constaté qu’en fonction du pays, les gens ne vous regardent jamais de la même manière.

J’ai changé de pays tous les 5 ans et j’ai du à chaque fois me retrouver devant de nouveaux “autres”. Après 5 ans en Angleterre, je savais parfaitement comment être une adorable petite fille bien élevée à l’école: mon uniforme était impeccable, mes cheveux bien attachés, j’avais toujours le sourire et la mine enjouée, calme et disciplinée je savais parfaitement comment plaire à mes camarades et à ma maîtresse. J’étais ce que la société anglaise aime, et ce qu’on attendait d’une petite fille française bien intégrée aux codes anglais. En prenant du recul, je me rend compte que je ne faisais que faire et reproduire ce qui plaisait aux autres que ce soit à l’école et autour de moi. Dès tout petits, nous sommes sous l’influence du regard des autres. On veut s'adapter aux autres, et leur plaire pour ne jamais être mis de côté.

L’étape suivante était la Russie. Là mes parents ont décidé de me mettre dans une école russe. Mais vous savez quoi? En arrivant, j’ai très vite compris qu’on n’allait pas m’aimer de la même manière. Je ressemblais plus à une anglaise qu'à une française. Il ne suffisait pas de sourire à la maîtresse pour lui plaire. Il fallait lui obéir au doigt et à l’oeil. Et j’ai alors dû me mettre aux nattes, à un horrible nouvel uniforme, à une autre langue, une autre manière de parler, d’écrire, de jouer… heureusement quand on est petit, on aime les nouveaux jeux, et c'est ce qui m'a permis de commencer à m'intégrer. Mais chaque matin, j’avais la boule au ventre sur la route, à l’idée qu’on allait peut être encore me faire ressentir ma différence. J’avais le sentiment d’être une intrus et de ne pas avoir ma place.

La personne qui m’a le plus aidé durant cette période, c’était la maîtresse russe. Elle m’a permis de comprendre les codes russes et à progressivement être ce que les petits russes et leurs parents aiment et attendaient de moi. Au bout de 5 ans, j’étais devenue presque la petite russe modèle; invitée à la datcha pour manger des chachliks.

Et enfin intégrée et reconnue, il a fallu encore partir pour un nouveau pays, la Roumanie, avec encore de nouveaux codes, et de nouveaux regards. Et là je sentais le mal de ventre revenir.

Mais alors ça va être comme cela toute ma vie ? Changer de manière de m'habiller, de parler, de rire, de me comporter à chaque fois que je change d’environnement ? Dépendante du jugement des autres et malheureuse tant que je n’ai pas compris ce que les autres attendent de moi ?

Mais dans ce cas là, que veut dire “Moi” ? Est-ce que comme un caméléon je dois changer de “Moi”, de personnalité à chaque fois que je suis sous un nouveau regard ?

Aujourd’hui lycéenne, je me rend compte qu’on accorde trop d’importance au regard, au jugement des autres. Que ce soit nos parents ou vous tous en face de moi, nous ne disons pas ce que nous pensons de tel ou tel sujet par peur de moquerie; même lorsque nous en sommes convaincus. Nous restons muets sur des sujets primordiaux par cette simple peur du jugement de l’autre. Comme si finalement l’autre avait toujours plus d’importance que nous même. Il dicte notre vie mais le problème c’est que personne ne nous dicte la même chose et cela peut vite tourner au cauchemar.

Laissons les autres de côté. Et s’ils n’existaient pas, ma vie serait-elle un paradis ?

En fait on ne peut pas vivre sans les autres même si parfois nous aimerions. Nous avons besoin d’amis et de soutien, et comme le disait Marc Twain “Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.” Nous sommes une société, et nous avons besoin de vivre en groupe, besoin des autres. Regardez autour de vous, pouvez-vous imaginer votre vie, une seule seconde, sans les personnes qui vous entourent, vos amis, votre famille et même vos ennemis? Moi non. Pour moi, me retrouver seule, avec personne pour parler, rire, échanger, me disputer… c’est aussi un enfer. 

Le regard d’autrui est indispensable pour se construire soi même et se connaître soi même. Les autres sont notre miroir, pour obtenir une vérité quelconque sur moi, il faut que je passe par l’autre.

Revenons à moi petite fille. Oui, les autres étaient un enfer pour moi au début de l’école russe. Au début j’étais celle dont on se demandait d’où elle venait. Et sans être harcelée, je souffrais de mon isolement, de mon incapacité à leur plaire, je voulais juste me fondre dans cet environnement, être comme eux pour pouvoir communiquer. Cela j’ai pu le surmonter au bout de plusieurs mois. J’ai appris avec eux, ils m’ont obligé à me dépasser moi même, à changer, à m’affirmer et à devenir ce que je suis. Malgré les difficultés, je ne peux pas imaginer ma vie sans cette période, elle m’a permis de devenir la personne que je suis aujourd’hui. Je me suis attachée à ces personnes qui pendant deux ans ont représenté mon quotidien. Cette amitié qui a tout changé. Passé un cap, j’étais moi et ils étaient eux. Nous avons trouvé une complémentarité, et maintenant j’ai compris; que face aux autres et à des nouveaux autres, je dois chercher non pas leur jugement mais nos différences.

Nous avons besoin des autres. Cette présence nous est nécessaire autant que respirer. L’enfer ne vient pas des autres mais plutôt de la façon dont chacun d’entre nous prête attention à leurs jugements.

Notre société est basé sur les autres, sans eux, rien de tout ce qui se trouve autour de nous n'aurait pu être construit. L’Homme est un être de communication, il a besoin des autres, et sans les autres il n’est rien. Autrui est une source d’enrichissement et d’aide pour nous car il nous apporte ce que nous n’avons pas.

Et comme le disait Saint-Exupéry: “si tu diffères de moi, mon frère, loin de me léser, tu m’enrichis”.

For the English version, click on "Read more"!

Hell IS other people! By Joshua HENRY


Hell is the others. But who are "the others"? What are "the others"? Ladies and gentlemen, YOU are "the others"! Every single one of you is a small part of the entity I will refer to as "the others"...

The Others are a bulldozer. A giant, very powerful machine, made to crush. It doesn’t crush things, it doesn’t crush objects. It crushes human beings. Not every person has the “privilege” to be crushed. You have this horrible destiny if you are different. The Others hate differences. It may vary, from a different hair color, to a different skin color, from a different style of clothes to a different way of thinking. If you want to live happily, then don’t be different.

There was a kid once, who loved school. He enjoyed going to classes, reading, learning, participating. But the Others didn’t. It was at first black stares, then the accusations of “sucky” followed. No, that little boy wasn’t answering in class to make the teachers like him. He was answering because he wanted to have more knowledge. However, the Others decided it was his fault. Was it bad to participate? Was it bad to like school? The Others had decided so. So the bulldozer charged on this little boy. He didn’t have a bag like the others had, he had glasses, read books at break, was one year younger. Did that make him a criminal? No, but that made him different. So he got ran over by the bulldozer. Public humiliation. Group beating. Book stealing. The only thing he was hearing from his class comrades were insults. Every morning he woke up, afraid yet forced to walk to what had become an arena, a fighting pit, a nightmare, hell.

Soon, he started to hate school. Something he had liked had turned into a complete hell. Every day he had to go to school, frightened of what was going to happen, which insult he would have to hear, which objects would be stolen, and who would beat him.

The Others had turned him sad, hurt and depressive. The innocence of the little boy, and his dreams, had been crushed. HE had been crushed. The constant bullying, the perpetual harassment, the feeling of exclusion, can only destroy a human being, especially the most fragile member of society, a kid.

Not everyone took part in the destruction process. Not everyone was bullying him. While some were crushing the little boy, the rest were watching, not doing anything. You do not know true rejection until you are afraid, desperate, broken, and hurt, and you look up to your comrades for help only to be ignored. In that crushing, the Others were actors and spectators at the same time.

When you walk past a person who’s getting beaten, and you don’t act, you too are helping to make his life a nightmare.

To those who walk away from the people who suffer, shame on you!

To those who reject persons for not being normal, shame on you!

To those who blame other people rather than question their own wrong doings, shame on you!

To those who take vicious pleasure in crushing difference, shame on you!

To those who let our society slowly transform into a clone factory, shame on you!

By ignoring the pain created by the Others when you have the power to stop it, you’re as guilty as they are. By looking away when that kid was getting beaten, or when someone was harassed, you were responsible of their pain too. If you don’t help, no one will. If you think that someone else will defend them, everybody will think the same. Stop being a worthless sheep. Stop being part of the silent spectating majority. Stop acting like everyone else. You are all different, and you can make a difference. You surely won’t change the world tomorrow, but you can change someone’s life today. You can make a difference. You have to make a difference. Stand aside from the cruel crowd. It doesn’t cost money, only some of your time and consideration, and what is it against someone’s life? You have to help those who suffer in front of you! Open your eyes! The Others are hellish, so don’t be like them, don’t act like them! You have a part of responsibility in everything that happens around you and that you ignore, so stand up!

Hell is the others for the people who are different.

Hell is the others when the persons around you don’t accept you as you are.

Hell is the others because they matter too much in someone’s personal development when they shouldn’t take a part in saying who you are.

Hell is the others because they crush you, and watch you suffer.

Hell is the others, because they ignore the pain they could stop.

L'enfer, c'est les autres ? Ombeline DESJONQUERES


Puisqu’il s’agit de parler des autres nous parlerons de solitude. Nous choisirons un personnage, que nous nommerons Lambda. Lambda n’a pas de sexe, Lambda n’a pas de couleur, pas de nation, de religion. Lambda est universel, et Lambda est malheureux.

Lambda vit dans la guerre, et sa famille est morte, mais ce n’est pas la violence qui cause son malheur, c’est la solitude qui a remplacé ceux qu’il aimait. Lambda est insulté et frappé, mais ce ne sont pas les mots et les coups qui le blessent, c’est sa solitude face à la foule. Lambda est malade, mais sa réelle douleur n’est pas la souffrance physique, c’est l’impossibilité de la partager. Oui Lambda est malheureux, et toutes les causes de son malheur, toutes les causes de tous les malheurs qu’il pourra jamais ressentir, ne sont que les pâles enfants trainant dans le spectre de la solitude : rejet, violence, incompréhension, cruauté.

Face à cette solitude, Lambda peut adopter mille visages. Il peut haïr, haïr les heureux, haïr ses bourreaux, et s’il n’en trouve pas haïr la Providence ; il peut se haïr lui-même. Lambda peut aussi pleurer, et si nul ne sèche ses pleurs alors lui ne pourra les sécher seul, et il se noiera en elles. Lambda peut croire en sa supériorité sur les hommes, il peut rire et se moquer du monde, mais son rire sera jaune car il résonnera seul. Lambda peut abandonner son combat, s’emprisonner dans ses fantasmes et faire des autres les marionnettes inventées de son bonheur fictif. Oui, Lambda peut s’engager dans mille voies, mais s’il s’y engage seul, elles ne feront que le mener plus profondément encore dans cette solitude qu’il tente de fuir.

Et si Lambda est si désespérément seul, alors il pensera une chose : l’Enfer, c’est les autres ; l’Enfer c’est la foule qui me frappe et détruit ce que j’aime, l’Enfer c’est la foule qui me rejette et m’humilie, l’Enfer c’est les heureux quand je suis malheureux.

Nous sommes tous semblables à Lambda, et nous sommes tous seuls, car nous sommes uniques. Cependant il existe un moyen d’être sauvé, un appui qui se dresse quand le flot des fantasmes, des peurs et des rages menace de nous engloutir : l’amour. Découvrir cet appui dans la houle sombre est une seconde naissance. Certains ne l’ont jamais ressentie, car toujours ils ont su aimer et être aimés ; mais peut-être pourtant glisseront-ils un jour de ce roc qui les maintient immergés, car les obstacles au fragile équilibre de notre bonheur sont millions et se tiennent au bas de l’îlot comme des harpies noires, prêtes à jaillir et vous sauter à la gorge à tout moment, à vous faire rouler jusqu’au flot. Il arrive que ces harpies se démènent, il arrive qu’elles se tiennent coites et immobiles ; certaines vies commencent sous l’eau, d’autres au sommet du roc ; certains glissent plus facilement, remontent plus difficilement. Pourquoi cette injustice ? Je ne sais, peut-être est-ce simplement une question de chance, peu importe. Ce qui compte, c’est de comprendre que chacun, quelque la difficulté avec laquelle il se hisse vers la lumière, chacun peut être sauvé par l’amour, par le miracle de peu de chose, la bonté spontanée, gratuite et inattendue d’un être dans la foule, un regard, une parole, une pression de la main.

Et si cet être aimé et aimant, qu’il soit famille, ami, amant ou inconnu, se tient au côté de Lambda, alors lorsque la foule s’abattra en vague furieuse sur ses épaules elle ne le mettra plus à terre, car face à sa force se tiendra non plus un être seul, mais une autre foule, restreinte certes, mais mille fois plus forte, car elle relève plutôt qu’elle détruit, elle pense plutôt qu’elle hurle, elle aime plutôt qu’elle hait.
Bien sûr le mal peut provenir d’un être seul. Mais si tout malheur est une forme de solitude, alors le bourreau ne fera finalement que livrer sa victime d’avantage à la foule, et ainsi se fondra en elle. Nul ne peut être l’unique responsable du malheur d’autrui, car le malheur n’existe pas sans la foule heureuse pour lui donner sa couleur par contraste.

L’humain est ainsi fait qu’il se blesse lui-même, et que le seul moyen qu’il a d’être sauvé de lui, c’est de construire autour de lui sa propre foule d’amours et d’amitiés, qui se dressera entre la solitude qu’il crée et le bonheur qu’il cherche. Disant sauvé de lui j’entends deux choses : sauvé de la foule et sauvé de son esprit. Car si la foule est l’instigatrice de la solitude, c’est l’esprit qui la transforme en malheur, en folie, en laissant tourner sans fin les doutes et les peines dans les cœurs, qui alors s’atrophient, s’étouffent et se détruisent. Ainsi l’amour, la confiance, la tendresse sont les seuls remparts contre le désespoir, car il est impossible d’être détruit à plusieurs, et souffrir ensemble est encore un plus grand bonheur que d’être heureux tout seul.

Ainsi Lambda serait-il sauvé des autres par les autres ? Non. Lambda est sauvé des autres par l’autre, de la foule par l’individu, d’un poing aveugle et hargneux par un visage tendre.

L’humanité torture l’humanité, l’humains soigne l’humain ; voilà tout le paradoxe, la dureté, et la beauté de notre espèce. Je ne peux souffrir sans les autres, mais je ne peux vivre sans l’autre.


Résumé

Tout malheur n’est qu’une forme de solitude, et la solitude n’existe pas si la foule, et donc les autres, ne dessinent pas sa forme par contraste. Si la foule cause le malheur, on peut en revanche en être sauvé par l’amour d’un individu. Ainsi, l’Enfer c’est les autres, mais le bonheur c’est aussi l’autre.

Summary

All miseries are forms of loneliness, and loneliness can’t exist if there is no crowd to give it its shape by contrast. The crowd is the cause of loneliness, yet one can be saved from it by love from an individual. Thus Hell is other people, but happiness is also the other.

Saturday, 25 March 2017

Is Hell other people? By Sarah ROUBERTOU

 

Who has never been hurt by others?

Others are an endless source of trouble. If you interact with someone you're bound to be in pain at some point because, sadly, it is human nature to be selfish and rude to others. Every relationship just becomes a vicious circle... You will inevitably hurt each other and things will end badly… It's really tough to be in a relationship!

Breaking someone's trust is like crumbling up a perfect piece of paper. You can smooth it over but it's never going to be the same again afterwards. You feel so hurt you don’t ever want to trust someone ever again! Who needs friends? I wish everyone would just leave me alone! I don’t care about anything anymore! I am better off on my own!

You resent others so you close off your heart… but a heart that lets nothing in will become empty. And you'll only hurt more, because, in the end, we need others…

This is the incredible concept of "love". At first glance it may seem foolish and common, but love is actually incredibly powerful. It's what keeps us safe. Love (be it from friends, lovers or family) is so simple yet so amazing.

You don’t want to get involved with anyone anymore because you’re scared of being hurt once again… but there’s nothing you can do about it, you need love!

True, there are people in this world who enjoy being alone. But there isn’t a single soul who can bear solitude. Everyone needs others. Otherwise, you’ll always feel incomplete. No one can live by himself. You need someone… to acknowledge you and to love you. And you need that someone to need you back. People need to be told they’re worthy of being alive or they can’t go on…

So, you choose to open your heart once more although you know it’s more likely to be broken again, and by opening your heart, you experience bliss. You find that being vulnerable is the only way that allows you to feel true pleasure, and that’s so real it scares you.

We are meant to feel, to love, and even to hate, and hurt, and cry, and break and be destroyed and to rebuild ourselves and to be destroyed again. This is humanity. This is what it means to be alive!

Love is something you can only share with others. That's why we are dependent on others. And, anyway, you can't avoid pain. Everyone will hurt you, in one way or another. You just have to find the people worth suffering for.

You see, I am not perfect either. I will annoy you, say stupid things, and then take it all back. We are not gods or demons, we are just humans. That’s why we’re allowed to make mistakes.

Do you think there’s a person in this world who has never hurt anyone else? It’s so easy to hurt someone. After all, each one of us is a part of this huge group called ‘others’. We are very good judges of others’ mistakes, aren’t we? And we’re such good lawyers for our own cause!

Don’t just mindlessly judge people as you please. Everyone you meet has weaknesses. Everyone is different but we are all insecure about something. Everyone hurts even if it’s not in the same way. It's important to always keep in mind that everyone has a past and a dark side they don’t want others to know about. Everyone puts on a mask that says: “Always fine, always okay, always on show.” But a smile doesn't necessarily mean that the person is alright. They just don’t show their feelings because they feel like nobody needs or wants to know.

We are one. Others aren't one big group of bullies. They’re billions of people just like me, longing for kindness. Rudeness is the weak person's imitation of strength. People are weak. You are weak. I am weak. We’re always only thinking about ourselves. But actually everyone just wants to be loved...

Anyway, if someone always follows the perfect path without ever facing hardship, is it really the best thing for that person? There's no such thing as a painless lesson. Experiences build character. Interaction with others enables us to grow, to become more mature, all together, but each at our own speed. If we are who we are today, it’s due to all the hardships we’ve been through.

You've been hurt, maybe you're still hurting, but this is what enables you to become a better person. We meet new people and so we change and I believe it is usually for the best. No matter how much or how often people hurt each other, loving someone is never a waste of time or energy. So don't resent others. Thank them for what they have taught you. Pain allows people to grow, but how you grow up is up to you.

One smile can start a friendship, one word can end a fight, and one person can change your life. Each new person you meet is an opportunity. Be a good person but don't waste your time trying to prove to people that you are. Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

When a relationship is over, leave. Stop watering a dead flower. There is no such thing as forever. Everything comes to an end, just as it should. It never gets easier. You just get stronger. All in all, everyone, including myself, has their flaws, but that’s what drives us to work together, to make up for those flaws. We are all different, but we need each other. We cover each others’ weaknesses. Together we are the perfect combination.

Others aren’t Hell. We need them. They are an opportunity...

Tuesday, 28 February 2017

Is hell other people? By Anna TA DAC


Hell is indeed other people

50,7% of people are introverts. For them, the 49,3% of people who are extroverts are, often, “hell” to put up with…

Most people have to live in cities, packed like sardines with millions of others. That can be hell.

Cosmopolitanism is a nice ideology, but groups of people, whose values and practices are different, find it difficult, sometimes impossible, to share a public space or territory with other groups of people. Culture shocks are common, leading sometimes to conflicts; think of the hellish civil war in Syria...

Most of us, to some extent, are afraid of and reject those that are different from ourselves. History is a long list of one people excluding, rejecting, persecuting, exploiting, denigrating, or trying to annihilate another people. Just one example: the White supremacists in the USA are more active than ever and they intend to continue making the lives of Blacks “hell”.

Some people are/become bad. Rapists, terrorists, and other such criminals, hurt and sometimes kill people, often for no apparent reason. They shake our faith in the goodness of humanity, making us feel unsafe and isolated.

Emil Cioran wrote: "Knowledge subverts love: in proportion as we penetrate our secrets, we come to loathe our kind, precisely because they resemble us." Hell is other people precisely because they are like ourselves. Perhaps we are all, to various degrees, guilty of self-loathing and misanthropy?


But hell is also the absence of other people...

Loneliness is the state of being alone and feeling sad about it. It affects everyone no matter their origins, gender or age. In fact, 1 in 5 Americans suffers from loneliness. In the United Kingdom, 51% of people aged 75 and over live alone (ONS, 2010). This problem has become so common it isn't surprising anymore when someone says that they are suffering from loneliness. “I don’t feel well in this society” is a recurring sentence heard by psychologists. However, their answer is often: “Don’t worry, it’s normal.” Yet it shouldn't be. Loneliness is a growing problem and studies show that it shortens your lifespan. But the number of lonely people keeps increasing. Even very young kids are confronted with a major problem: how to make friends. People who suffer from a lack of human contact are at risk of depression and other mental illnesses. This proves how important human relations are.

Most people would not survive outside society. Community means safety and the sharing of knowledge; progress comes from people working together. Solidarity is what makes us human and I believe that feeling supported is crucial to a person’s well-being. When you have a family and you have friends, when you live in society, you are usually happy.

People also help you “discover” yourself, and open up your mind to give you a different view on the world. That is why children need to learn to live with other children in order to become sociable adults. Without positive interaction with others, we become totally close-minded and self-centred. If I was all alone on this earth, my existence would have no meaning whatsoever because it is social interaction that brings colour to my life.


We should try to do our best to get on with each other, so as to make our world more bearable, less hell-like, less lonely, don't you think?

Monday, 27 February 2017

Is hell other people? By Gaëlle DE BRITO

Hell is horrible. It is a netherworld everyone fears, an extremely unpleasant and inescapable place in which the dead are condemned to suffer forever. Hell can also be defined as a personal state of misery and torment. But can hell be “other people”? Spontaneously, I’d answer yes because this world just seems to be getting worse and it is people who are making it so…

Every day, kids suffer from being bullied. Bullying can be physical and verbal (including cyberbullying). People often attack a person just because that person is different (physically) or sometimes just because they feel the need to torture someone else. This has a huge impact on the victim: they feel lonely, unloved, and lack self-confidence, and don’t know how to interact with other people anymore. And they usually never talk about it to anyone and the loneliness with all the bad feelings that accumulate can drive some to kill themselves. The figures regarding bullying keep rising. Prevention campaigns try to make kids aware of the impact that bullying can have.

Bullying doesn’t just take place at school; the same thing exists for adults in the work place: moral (and sexual) harassment. Bullying proves that “hell is other people.”


There are people who are very anxious and being with other people is sometimes very complicated for them. When someone like this has to talk to a group of people, this can be awful for them; it is indeed the presence of other people that makes a living hell for the anxious person. So when someone suffers from severe anxiety (or clinical depression) the whole world is hell. Anxiety is actually a very common phenomenon.

In your life, there must have been people who have disappointed you? They make you feel like you’re important to them, and then they leave you as if nothing ever happened between you and you just feel like you’re nothing in this world and then you’re scared to trust someone again and you just see other people as bad people.

In the past there were bad people, and there are a lot of bad people in the world today. They destroy people’s lives: a violent husband who hurts his wife and his children, or a parent who gives up their child for no real reason, or the parents who don’t really care about their kids. There are also the dangerous people who rape, kidnap, torture, or kill a huge number of innocent people.


We can also talk about the people who are destroying our planet and the life on it just for economic reasons. In Africa there are a lot of poachers who kill elephants and rhinoceroses for their tusks because they can sell them for a good price. People like this are very stupid and their actions are destroying the animal species in Africa (in the past century, there were 20 million elephants, and today there are only 500,000 left). I take Africa as an example, but this happens everywhere; polar bears are disappearing because people kill them for their fur to make coats, and this happens to a lot of animals all over the world. People are destroying parts of the planet like the Amazonian rainforest (58% of the trees that are cut down illegally are not even used). By destroying forests, people are destroying the biodiversity on which we depend. This is further proof that hell is caused by (other) people.


Is there no hope? Are all people bad? No, there are NGOs that help people or try to save the animals. There are people who want to do good. They are generous (think of Les Restos du Coeur, and Wildlife Angel). These kinds of associations do not get enough support; they need to be better known because not enough people have heard of them. Every day there are people who fight for the homeless, or the elephants or the rainforest, or for so many other causes. There still are good people ready to help others.


There are often demonstrations all around the world to free an innocent prisoner or for Gay rights, or to protest against dangerous leaders like Trump or Putin. People are not afraid to stand up to the authorities in order to defend their cause. Even if the cause doesn’t affect them personally, they do this for other people.

This courage is also demonstrated when there are disasters around the world. Hundreds, even thousands of people then help each other. There is real solidarity. Sometimes, on the news, we see a baby being rescued from under the rubble thanks to team effort. So, in this instance, hell isn’t other people because people are not hurting each other, they are saving lives. Every day, in so many places, there are people who work to help and save others: tireless doctors, nurses, surgeons, psychologists, rescue workers, firefighters, teachers, etc. They often risk their own safety to help others.

What about your parents? They, most of them, try to do their best for you. They stand by your side, put you first. They know you better than anyone and they love you. They try to make you feel happy. And this is the same thing with our friends and all the people who love us and who do not abandon us.

Hell is other people? Sometimes yes, other times, no. It’s a bit yin and yang, don't you think? As Sartre wrote: “… in the concentration camps, I learnt to believe in men.” Good experiences usually make people good, and bad experiences often make people bad, but I believe you can, up to a point, choose to do good and even decide if you will let other people make (your) life hell.